I'm Happy One Minute, Sad and Depressed the Next

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Question: What's wrong with me? I'm 24 and have been through a lot, like many people in this world. My husband passed away two years ago. He was missing for four days. I was passing out flyers and searching for him when I drove up and saw his car on the side of the road, surrounded by ambulances and fire trucks.

I have two lovely sons and a wonderful man in my life who treats me like an angel. He understands the pain I've been through and treats my sons like his own. I have these outbursts where I suddenly get angry at him. Out of the blue I yell at him and tell him that I don't want him around. I feel happy one minute, then mad and depressed the next. What is causing me to act like this?  Do other people go through this? Is this due to what I've been through? I try to move on with my life, but sometimes It's just hard. I'm worried about getting close to this man, then losing him too. Please help. Thanks.

Answers:

Ms. Mystery: Your feelings of uncertainty and stress are very normal reactions to what you've been through. It is natural to feel insecure, even after two years. You went through a horrible experience you never want to repeat. Your

subconscious is protecting you by pushing your man away at times. It's telling you to take things slow and take more time. You are young, so don't be in a hurry to get remarried. Things will get easier in eventually. It sounds like you have a great guy and two beautiful daughters. Be thankful and focus on enjoying each day one at a time. Time heals all wounds.

Answers:

Mr Know:  Dear 24, you don't give enough information. First of all, have you acted like this before your husband's death? If not, then obviously you're having some tough issues in regards to losing your husband. You didn't specify how you lost him. Was it drugs? Natural causes? I think you are reacting to your current boyfriend negatively because you aren't ready for another serious relationship, no matter how nice the guy is. Most likely you're still in a grieving stage. You're only 24, and you should take things day by day. Don't be in a hurry, but don't push this guy away because it is not easy to find a nice guy willing to be a father to your kids. When you're feeling like you're going to blow up, count to 10 and take a walk. There's nothing wrong with you. You've gone through a lot for a 24 year old. Good Luck and Godspeed.

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