Good Luck and Confess

He Hits Me. Should I Leave?

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Question: Why am I the only person to see my husband's temper? I'm married and have a child with a man who hits me all the time and calls me every bad name in the book. I'm the only person who ever sees this side of him.

I talked to his exes and his mother and they all say he's a nice, sweet, calm person and that they've never see that side of him. He was with his exes longer than I have even known him. He tells me he is violent toward me because he cares more about me than any of them. My friends say I bring out the worst in him. He says he loves me and never wants me to leave him. Why does he hurt me? I did file charges against him for the abuse.   

Mr. Know: You need to pack up and leave NOW! My mother was physically abused by my father. She stayed with him for

Did He Mean What He Said When He was Drunk?

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Question: I have a guy friend who I've known for several years.  We talk a lot and and I really like him. My problem is that I don't know what he thinks or wants. We talk nearly every day on the phone. Last week we spent two evenings together. One of those nights he was drinking and told me he cares about me and he wants to be with me.  I told him it was just the alcohol talking and blew him off.  What do I do?  I really like this guy, but I don't know what to think. I don't want to be pushy! What should I do? 

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: This is an easy one! I've answered this one so many times to my girlfriends. First of all, alcohol lowers your inhibitions, so you say the things that you are afraid to say when you are sober. You tell the truth. Believe it, he really does care and wants to be with you!

The #1 thing that screws up love is FEAR! He had fear of telling you how he felt until he had a few drinks. Now you have fear that he didn't mean what he said and are afraid of

How to Get Over the Girl Who Messed with My Head

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Question: I really liked this really cute girl. We were close at one point, but out of nowhere she started ignoring me and started flirting with other guys in front of me. I was confused at first, then after a while I started not caring. Now she's calling my name, waving and smiling at me again. I just act cool, hanging with my friends and flirting with girls. If she gets close I just walk away. I don't feel the same about her anymore, but a small part of me misses what we had. It really drove me nuts then she was was ignoring me and it hurt. We're in the same science class, so I can't completely avoid her. How can I get over her?

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: Either she doesn't know what the heck she wants, or she likes you and decided to try to make you jealous in order to test you to see if you really liked her or not.

She flirted with other guys and it backfired. Instead, she drove you away and confused you. Now she's gone back to flirting with you. Dating is confusing. Everyone is afraid to be

The Secret to Pleasing a Woman in Bed

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Question: Until 16 days ago, my wife and I made love almost every day. Suddenly  I'm not looking forward to it at all. I'm 43 and she's 34 and we've been happily married for 12 years. I'm the one who wanted it every day. If it were up to her, we'd do it twice a week.

We've been happily married for 12 years. I'm the one who always wanted it every day. If it were up to her we'd do it a couple of times a week. I have a feeling she does it for me out of obligation, not pleasure. This suspicion didn't bother me until two weeks ago when I asked her how similar she thought the feeling inside her vaginal walls were compared to the sensitivity of my penis. I used to think the first few inches in the vagina felt pleasure during sex and expected her to say it felt great for her too. Her answer stunned me.

She said she doesn't really feel anything inside! I need to know she really enjoys sex or I can't reach orgasm. Now that I know she doesn't feel anything inside, I've totally lost interest in sex.

I used to love thinking about sex all day and having fun with our little inside sex jokes, innuendos, gentle kissing and touches, but now it's all gone. My wife says she's happy I haven't talked about sex lately. I am totally and secretly falling apart inside. I've since read that other women have limited feeling of the vaginal walls. I've known for years that she doesn't put fingers inside while masturbating and that didn't mean anything to me until now.

I want to talk to her, but she hates talking about sex, so she would get defensive and feel hurt. If I keep it to myself it will

Wife's Affair Broke Up Marriage: How to Protect the Kids

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Question: I am wondering if I have any rights to protect my children from being around my future ex-wife's boyfriend. They had an affair and broke up our marriage. Now I have strong feelings that the kids shouldn't be exposed to a life around him - or any time with him even though they have not met him yet.

Answer: Ms. Mystery & Mr. Know: This is a great question many divorced parents are wanting to know. First of all, it sounds like you really care about your kids. This can get you far in family court.

We are not lawyers or legal experts, however we do know that many states will allow a provision in the divorce papers stating that the parents cannot have overnight guests of the opposite

How to Tell if He's Serious

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Question: I'm casually seeing a guy, but I want it to be more. I'm not sure is he wants more. I can't just ask him what he wants. How can I tell if he's serious or this is just a fling? Are there some signs to look for?

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: Hey, girl! Slow down. The guy is the one who usually takes the lead. Guys love to take the lead, so you need to make him chase you. Don't start chasing him and wanting more or you'll only chase him away. And don't always answer your phone when he calls. Don't always be available. I'm sure you have a life and don't sit around waiting for him. Guys love the chase. NEVER EVER forget that.

And if he is serious, here's the clue: He'll talk about doing

Should I Move for Love?

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Question: Should I risk everything and move for love or stay where I am?  I'm nearly 34, never married and no children.  My financial worth has taken an enormous hit over last year. My father has been ill and has no health insurance, and the value of my house has taken a huge hit like many others. I was also laid off for six months.  I'm under stress and trying to sell my house. I am thinking of lowering the price by $25k but will only walk away with about $50k.  If I move I have an offer for a great job, plus a loyal and devoted boyfriend who makes a good income. We've been very good friends for a long while. He keeps hinting that he's 35 and is ready to start a family and tells me I'd make a great mom.

My problem is that I can't leave until I sell my house. Should I drop the price and get on with my life or should I wait until I sell it for the price I want?

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: First of all, you are more focused on the money than you are on him. At first I thought you didn't love him, and he loved you and it's easier for you to just be with him after all the misery you've been through lately. But now I'm guessing

Is Phone Sex Cheating?

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Question: I am in an argument with my best friend. Is phone sex cheating? She is married and has three kids and told me she had phone sex with one of her old boyfriends who she was madly in love with before she got married. She says she doesn't think what she did is wrong.

I'm shocked! What do you think? Is it wrong to have phone sex with someone else while you are married? Is that considered cheating?

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: First of all, yes your friend was emotionally cheating on her husband by relating that way with another man. You know her husband would see it as cheating. Ask your friend how she'd feel if her husband did the same. If that really wouldn't bother her then she either doesn't love him, or they

How to Win Her Back

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Question: For two years I dated a wonderful girl. She was the woman of my dreams. We got into a small fight when I saw her talking to an old boyfriend. She said she's not sure she loves me and broke up with me.

She is leaving to go to college and tells me she doesn't want to be tied down. I understand that, but I'm miserable without her. She told me she love me when I last saw her.

I haven't talked to her in two weeks. Do you have any advice on how to get her back?

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: This is life. She's not ready for a long-term relationship, and you are. The timing is off and there's nothing you can do right now other than to let her go. If you chase her you risk pushing her away and losing her forever. Have you heard that old saying "If you love someone and you set them free, they will come back if they belonged to you. If they don't

The Best Way to Flirt with Women

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Question: What's the best way to flirt with a woman and let her know that I like her? I need some advice.

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: The #1 way to flirt with a woman is to listen to her. Ask her questions and be truly interested in her answers. Tell her she's beautiful in specific terms such as you love the color of her eyes, or the shape of her lips. But it's even more exciting to a woman if you also tell her you appreciate her brains, talent, sense of humor, whatever. She'll feel wonderful around you and want to be around you more.

You can build instant attraction by touching her on the arm a second or two while you're talking to her. Physical contact works like magic. Sometimes a touch will trigger an attraction. Try it! But once you flirt you must follow through