Affairs

My Girl Slept with My Cousin!

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Question: My girl did the dirt with my cousin. I only found out today my heart is broken. What do I do? I'm falling apart.

Answers:
Ms. Mystery:  Your girl did the dirt with your cousin!? That absolutely sucks. Of course it hurts. Of course she's not worthy of a single tear from you, and not worthy of your thoughts. And she was never even worthy of being your girlfriend. Telling you all this doesn't help ease your pain right now. It still hurts like hell! And that she did this with your cousin? What the heck was he thinking doing that to you? Unfortunately you can't pick your family.

Your broken heart feels very real. I know, I've had my share of them myself. And unfortunately it happens to EVERYBODY. Look around, everyone has had a broken heart or two or several. Thousands of songs have been written by broken hearts. Listen to the radio and you'll hear song after song about broken hearts.

I have found that it takes 50% of the time you were together to completely get over that person. Unless you keep letting them string you along - don't let that happen because then it might take even longer.

I promise that after the pain has eased and you can see clearly, you will wonder why the hell you ever dated her in the first place. You will feel nothing for her. You will find another, wonderful girl, who won't do this to you. Please don't be the guy who never trusts any other girls after this one "rotten apple."

I know of a guy who caught his girl cheating with his best friend in high school. He's in his late 40s and still won't open himself up to women. He has never been married or even had a long-term girlfriend. Don't let this cheating, lying girl ruin you for future relationships! Don't give her that power over you.

I know of another guy who caught his WIFE cheating with his BROTHER! He got divorced, then his ex-wife married his brother! His broken heart healed and now he realizes that he's actually very lucky and his brother's now stuck with this girl.

I promise you are lucky to find out what she is like now instead of later. Time does heal all wounds.

Mr. Know:  There's no need for you to fall apart. Drop her like a hot potato and don't look back. This girl is bad news. And please, don't try to think of million reasons why you should stay together.

How Do I know if My Husband is Bi, Part 2

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Question: My husband seems to be attracted to our neighbor next door, I just have a very sick feeling that he likes him more than just for a friend. My husband gets upset and looks for him when he is not at home, he mows his grass and, water his lawn for him.... I feel a strange connection between them and I feel very uncomfortable around them. The neighbor does not like me around when he is with my husband, they always sit closer than others, there are so many things that I notice I can't write them all down... Most of all my gut feeling isn't a good one, what can I do to find out for sure?

Answers:
Mr. Know: I have some very bad news for you. One thing I have personally learned, being a guy, is that woman's intuition is one of the most powerful forces on the planet. Most men do not have this type of intuition and we are the inferior sex. Personally, without doing any spying, I think that your husband is cheating on you with this man. I find it insane that he would be mowing his lawn. Think about it. If you husband was mowing a woman's lawn, what would you think?

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How Can I Get Her to Admit Her Affair?

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Question: Okay guys, a little advice here please, I just found out that 9 months ago my girlfriend had an affair. I only found out because her phone bills went from £30pm to £140pm. When I confronted her she told me it was a female friend who was going through a difficult patch. This did not wash and although I could not prove anything. I kept digging.

6 months later she finally admitted to texting a bloke, again it did not wash so I kept on digging. A few nights later she admitted to meeting him 5 times over the 3 month period. One of these times was at MY HOUSE while i was OUT WORKING for our family !!

She admitted to kissing on these occasions and going to meet him, and meeting him at her friend's house. However she will not admit they were intimate!!!!

I find it hard to believe, if not impossible, that 2 people can have an affair over a period of time and not be intimate!! She said he tried to "go down on her once and she told him to stop and leave." She says that was it that was the only intimate time!! Why cant she TELL ME THE TRUTH???

Them being in my home killed me. Surly being honest about sex won't make me feel any worse.

She says it was never physical on her part, and that she was going through a bad patch with me and he was saying all the right words. She says she never found him physically attractive, and it was all in his patter. She says she never had feelings for him only for the things he said. If this is so why risk a seven year relationship? Why risk leaving 2 children fatherless? Why risk it at all?

She says she loves me and want us to get married and live happily ever after, BUT I NEED to know THE TRUTH. How can I get her to finally come clean and tell me everything? She claims she has but she also claimed for 9 months while I was asking her to come clean that she had not been unfaithful??

Any ideas greatly appreciated.

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: Every relationship goes through a rough patch. Just ask your grandparents! It's all a matter of getting past it and forgiving each other and moving forward.

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How Can I Stop My Lover from Leaving Me for a Sugar Daddy?

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Question: I have been in a gay relationship for five years with my boyfriend, throughout the five years he has cheated on me various times and hit me. And every time I forgave him and let him come back.

I've also cheated on him out of revenge and done things he doesn’t know about. I want this so bad to work out, but I'm tired of crying for him and him crying for me.  We just keep going in circles.

Last time we broke up and got back together, I gave up everything he asked me to. I expected us to work on things to finally get it together and be happy. Well he told me that while we were still together and he was in California for a month, he posted a craigslist ad and found a  wealthy man who wined and dined him while he was out there. He said he came back to live with me again because it was best place for his daughters to grow up and I wanted to help as much as I can.

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Help! I'm Commitment-Phobic

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Question: I have a big problem with commitment. I am a 31 year old woman. I have confidence and other people tell me I'm an outgoing and pleasing person. However, I have a problem committing to my relationships.

I have been in 5 'committed' relationships, between one and four years long. But after the first couple of months I get bored, then I'm unfaithful and find a way to get out of the relationship. I've always made sure my partners get the blame and make them feel guilty, but I know the problem is me.

After I leave them I miss them and feel bad about what I have done. I call them, but in the meantime have a new 'lover'. I end up in a situation of having a 'committed' relationship with a man, while still phoning, visiting and having sex with my previous partner. I can not carry on like this anymore. Last night I 'dumped' my partner only to be with someone 'new' I met two weeks ago at a friend's place. I am still uncertain about going back to my previous, previous partner. Please help!

Answers:
Ms. Mystery: You do have a problem. Perhaps you just aren't a person who should be committed and you should start being up front about it instead of hurting these guys. Just face it, you may never find the right guy. However if you do eventually want to get married, you will need to stop what you are doing and be faithful. Perhaps you jump from one relationship to the

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Wife's Affair Broke Up Marriage: How to Protect the Kids

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Question: I am wondering if I have any rights to protect my children from being around my future ex-wife's boyfriend. They had an affair and broke up our marriage. Now I have strong feelings that the kids shouldn't be exposed to a life around him - or any time with him even though they have not met him yet.

Answer: Ms. Mystery & Mr. Know: This is a great question many divorced parents are wanting to know. First of all, it sounds like you really care about your kids. This can get you far in family court.

We are not lawyers or legal experts, however we do know that many states will allow a provision in the divorce papers stating that the parents cannot have overnight guests of the opposite

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Do I Stay With a Cheater?

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Question:  I recently discovered my fiance cheated physically on his first wife with someone from work. He also cheated emotionally on his second wife with someone at work. When I asked him about this he lied to me and adamantly denied cheating on either one. Finally, he broke down and told the truth, that he did cheat. He swears he would never cheat on me but I see a pattern and it scares me. When I tell him I want out he cries hysterically, begging me back and threatening that he can't live without me. Should I leave because he lied and has a history of infidelity? If yes, how do I leave without breaking his heart?

Answers:
Ms. Mystery:  Well, it sounds like he's getting better with each wife. First it was physical, then only emotional the second time, so you should have nothing to worry about. Joking! Sort of.

So you are going to be number three. It's very possible he has learned a lesson and has grown up after those two bad marriages. Perhaps he married his first wife before he was

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Should He Forgive Her for Affair?

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Question: I cheated on my boyfriend of five years. I felt terrible and was very depressed for a while. I kept my stress to myself, but then my boyfriend found out. He was crushed and I went back home to be with my family for a while in order to work things out, I know it will take time, but now everyone knows what I did. I know I must face my mistakes, but I'm worried about what his family thinks. I don't want them to think that i would ever anything like that again. My boyfriend and I are spending more time together. We love each other, but both know it will take time to heal things. What can I do to make things better?

Answers:
Mr. Know:  Don't worry about what his family might think. What really matters is what he thinks. Spending time together without any pressure is the right approach. What's going to be

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Should I Cheat on My Husband?

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Question: I have been married for ten years and have four kids. We dated since we were 13 years old. When I was 15 I cheated on him and we broke up for two years. After that we got back together, got married and started a family. A guy I had sex with when I was 17 called me a few weeks ago, out of the blue. We've been chatting late at night. I know this is wrong! But it's exciting and I haven't felt this way in so many years. I'm so turned on that I want to cheat on my husband. Please help. Am I going to hell?

Answers:

Mr. Know: Congratulations on getting hooked up at 13. You need to stop all communication with this old boyfriend IMMEDIATELY. I speak from personal experience. My high school sweetheart contacted my brother and wanted to get my email and started e-mailing me. I did not communicate with

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Should I Stay with My Sugar Daddy?

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Question: I have dated the same guy for two years. I don't feel like our relationship is going anywhere. I don't feel happy like I used to. I keep thinking about my ex boyfriend who's in a relationship and has a baby. My boyfriend doesn't satisfy me sexually anymore and we fight all the time. Sometimes I want to be with him and sometimes I don't. I cheated on him before and am considering doing it again. The problem is that if I leave him, I can't make it financially and I seem to be addicted to him. I am confused and don't know what to do. Please help.

Answers:

Mr. Know: Are you kidding me? Let me get this straight: you are not happy with him, you think about your ex, you've cheated on your boyfriend, you are not sexually satisfied and you are considering cheating on him again. You are addicted to him because he is financially taking care of you. Basically, he is your Sugar Daddy. From the way I see it, you are performing "services" for being able to have a roof over your head. Your options are really simple: (1) Get a new sugar daddy that you like and can get along with, (2) leave and find

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